Monday, December 24, 2018

That's Preposterous !

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I want to give preposterously.  I want to give outrageously.  I want to give immoderately.  I want to give lavishly.  I want to give fully.  I want to give generously and wisely.  I want to give exorbitantly.

Do I want to give sacrificially?  Yes.  I want to give sacrificially.  I want to give privately and anonymously.  For every time I get caught giving, I want to get away with it in secret another time.  What is it to give a $20 bill fresh from the ATM on a whim when all I have to do is go to the next ATM which is never more than 50 feet away and get more.  I want to give my sandwich, my last sandwich, to someone who has no sandwich.  I want to go all the way.

But I’m scared.  I’m always scared.  But I’m practical.  I’m always practical.  But I have a backup plan.  I always have a backup plan.  But I’ll do it later.  I’ll always do it later.  But others are counting on me.  I always blame it on the others.  Why don’t I show the others how to do it?  What if they don’t follow?  Does it matter?  My soul hangs in the balance.  My giving is in question.

The camel stands at the eye of the needle.

I’m the one who is compelled to give exorbitantly.  I don’t know your path.  Maybe you are learning to receive? Can I receive?  Can I ask?  How will I know if I am never in need?

I know why the rich, young man walked away sad.  I’ve assumed my whole life he didn’t sell all he had to give to the poor.  Upon a re-reading, it just says he walked away sad.  It doesn’t say he didn’t do it.  Actually, just because I haven’t done it yet doesn’t mean I won’t.  Here’s the process; sell, give, follow, enter.  Sell,  Give.  Follow.  Enter.  Enter the Kingdom.

Merry Christmas.

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